Tuesday, December 31, 2002
i'm on my way to LAX!!! FINALLY!! it feels like i've been counting down to this forever!!! yay!

posted at 5:22 AM

Sunday, December 29, 2002

ok, here's my proclamation to the world: I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND!!!!!! you make me happy, rick. *big grin*

posted at 12:18 PM

Friday, December 27, 2002

just three more days and then i get on a plane and go to see my rick!!!! =P

posted at 11:17 PM

Thursday, December 26, 2002

i just realized something about myself. sometimes, when bad things happen, or if i just feel down or whatever, and people try to cheer my up by putting a good spin on everything, it only makes me feel worse. cuz, sometimes, all i really want is for someone to say, "yeah, that sucks. i'm sorry." and that's it. just for someone to understand where my frustration or sadness or worries are coming from. because when people tell me that i shouldn't worry, or i shouldn't be upset, or shouldn't feel sad, it's like my feelings are dumb or wrong or something. and sometimes they might be a little blown up, but they still come from somewhere, are grounded in something. i guess sometimes i just want a little sympathy. a shoulder to cry on if need be. not so much the words that are supposed to help me feel better. cuz it's usually stuff that my rational mind knows already, anyway. and this isn't directed at anyone who has tried to make me feel better anytime recently, cuz i do appreciate the effort. and i don't know if this is anything other people might feel, but, like i said before, this is something that i just realized about me. and self-realization feels pretty good right about now.

posted at 1:55 AM

another christmas come and gone. i hope everyone had a good one. as for me, it was ok. nothing more and nothing less than i expected. i missed some very important people in my life, tho. but what can you do? just enjoy what you can with the people that are there, i suppose. and i did. it was just me, vanessa, crystal, and my mom. a little lonely, but it was fine. and tomorrow, back to the daily grind. eh.

posted at 12:59 AM

Monday, December 23, 2002

woo-hoo! i came home today and my internet was finally working!!!! i think jordan may have called the dsl company today. i'm not too sure cuz he's gone home already. but whatever it was, yay! also, i came home and part one of my christmas present from emily was waiting for me in the mail. it was a copy of one of the books i had that "mysteriously" disappeared over the summer. so i guess the second part she was talking about will be the other book that also disappeared. awwww! thank you, emily!! this just about makes up for the sucky time i had this weekend waiting for triple a at the side of the road again, cuz my car fucked up again, and spending a bunch more money to get it fixed. *sigh* i guess i should just be used to it by now. *dejected sigh* but i refuse to let it get me too down. like jen and tyler were telling my when all this mess happened, it could be a lot worse.

on a brighter note, i accomplished everything i wanted to this weekend. i saw adaptation w/ jen, i finished my christmas shopping, i went shopping some more for some warm clothes for myself (with nancy...killing two birds w/ one stone), i also had dinner w/ nancy, and i made the trip to newport w/ jen to visit tyler. turns out his christmas surprise was a mixed cd that he made, and he gave me and jen a copy each. and he also gave each of us a bottle of wine. only i still have jen's bottle cuz we left them in the car when it was towed to pep boys. so i shall get that to you upon your return to l.a., jen. and thank you, tyler, for the lovely gifts. oh, and for the nogg, too. good times. =)

and the trip to seattle draws ever so near! yay! one week!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hehe, can you tell i'm excited? can't wait to see rick in his home environment! it shall be interesting, indeed! =P

posted at 7:54 PM

Friday, December 20, 2002

i decided i don't think i could ever live by myself. coming home to an empty, cold apartment is vey vey sad. i'm in the same boat as jen. all the roommates are gone, and i'm all alone and bored. albert's gone for all of break, and jordan and diane are in vegas, but should be back, soon, i think. but i know diane will immediately leave again, to go home and stay there for the rest of break. jordan i think will stay in the apartment w/ me for all of break except for christmas, when we'll both be home home w/ our families. and i'm not sure what he has planned for new year's, but i know i'll be gone. luckily though, i think he'll be there when i get back. and the week i get back is when everyone will start trickling back, as well. yay, people! but yeah, living alone would not suit me well, i don't think. i like my current set-up a lot, though. my own room, where i can go into and close the door whenever i feel i need some privacy, but having a good amount of roommates i can go out and be social with when i don't want to be alone. works out quite well, indeed!

plans for the weekend: see adaptation w/ jen tonight. finish christmas shopping this weekend, and also shop for warm clothes for my trip to the wintery state of washington. hang out w/ nancy. hopefully make a trip down to newport to check out tyler's new place, and to check out this christmas surprise he's been talking about. and i think that's it. and, woo-hoo, christmas next week!

posted at 12:57 PM

Thursday, December 19, 2002

i decided i like queens of the stone age A LOT. and yet, i still don't have any of their albums. *cough*hinthint*cough* ;)

posted at 1:40 PM

rickless yet again. =(

(and still no internet at home! grrrrr!)

posted at 10:01 AM

Wednesday, December 18, 2002

still no internet at home. sad. =(

but i get to see rick today! happy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he should be back in LA right about...NOW!

posted at 11:16 AM

Tuesday, December 17, 2002

arrggghhh! no internet access at home again!!! i don't know what happened. and albert went home to new mexico for break so we can't bug him about it. he's the one that deals with all the dsl stuff at the apartment. doh! hopefully the server was just down for a bit and when i get home today it will be magically working again. *crosses fingers* please, please, please...

anyway, so i finally talked to chris yesterday. i had written him an e-mail after i found out about the aim blocking thing, and he called me on saturday to let me know he got it and that he did want to talk to me about it. so we decided to see each other monday night and just get everything out there. and so we did. we decided on my place, cuz he said that he wanted to see it, and plus i figured that if we were gonna get into emotional stuff, a public place probably wouldn't be a good idea. and it worked out fine. it was a little awkard, though, cuz obviously, we talked in the living room. and besides the couch in there , there's only one chair to sit it, which altho isn't too too far from it, did put a distance between us, more so than if we had gone out to coffee somewhere. but i guess both of us sitting on the couch coulda been even weirder, cuz we probably just wouldn't know how to position ourselves, given the circumstances. ok, i'm getting off track. so he got there and i showed him the apartment, then we settled into the living room and at first we were talking about general stuff. catching up and such. and then when there was obviously nothing more to talk about in that respect, he brought up the e-mail i sent him. and right off the bat he said that he really appreciated that i sent it, cuz when he blocked me he thought that i just didn't care anymore and figured that he should just move on. but when he got the e-mail, that was when he knew that he was wrong, and that i did care, and that i still wanted to try to make this friendship work. one of the things i said in the e-mail was that the aim blocking really hurt because to me, that represented that he no longer wanted me as part of his life. and i remember writing in this very blog how i felt back when he was just about to leave to japan, how i was feeling so uncertain about what would happen, but still so sure that we'd be friends no matter what. and that aim blocking felt like a slap in the face because it meant that everything that i believed was completely wrong. but he told me that him blocking me was in no way meant to be a personal thing against me. and we cleared the whole thing up. he said that when we went for a long time without chatting, that was when he took it as a sign that i didn't care at all. and he blocked me because it was easier that seeing me online and wondering why i wasn't im'ing him. but i told him that i was just trying to hang back, and wanting to follow his lead, cuz i didn't want to push things past what he was comfortable with. and i assured him that i still wanted a friendship with him. and he said that he still wanted that, too, but that it was still very very hard for him. and he said that another reason for him blocking me was cuz it was hard for him when we did chat, and it was just totally casual, completely different from the relationship we had before. and that it was even harder seeing me and being around me and knowing that it was never gonna be like before. and that he still couldn't handle us taking it down so many levels. and the result of all the talking was that he still needed a lot more time. and we're gonna keep going with the strategy that i kinda had in my head all along, with me hanging back and giving him as much time and space as he needs, and waiting to take my cues from him. he'll keep me blocked on aim, but once he explained all his reasons, i completely understand and don't feel bad about it anymore. and one thing that he said that made me feel really good was that even though he wasn't ready to have just a casual friendship with me, he said that if anything ever happened and i felt like i needed him, he'd totally be there for me. that meant soooo much to me. it felt really good to talk about all this with him. there's still hope yet!

posted at 6:10 PM

Monday, December 16, 2002

so anyway, my celebrity spotting. so jordan and i went to my business christmas party, which was actually pretty cool. very casual, everyone was very merry, and plus, free food and drink! score! hehe. we ended up staying there a little longer than we'd thought, and so decided to go straight to 'sc instead of going back to the apartment to get into our pajamas, which turned out to be a good thing. cuz we never made it to the pajama party. jordan didn't have the exact address and he couldn't get a hold of the anyone who might know where it might be. but we weren't ready to go home yet, so then i called a few people and found out about this one party on 24th street, the "pimps and ho ho ho's" party. so we stopped by there, but didn't really feel the vibe. neither of us seemed to know anyone there. i did spot michael and lawrence, but they were each talking to girls, so we weren't about to be cock blocks. we danced for a bit, cuz we figured we owed it to ourselves, but then a justin timberlake song came on, and it was all over. so we started to head home, but then decided that we still weren't ready to go home, so we decided to go to fred 62, cuz we figured the only places still open would be food places. at first i suggested bob's big boy, cuz i'd never been to one and i always pass by the one on wilshire, but jordan said it would probably be closed. so then he threw out a bunch other places, fred 62 being one of them. and fred 62 stuck out cuz i know emily and jen had recently been there, and they seemed to think it was pretty cool. so we decided on that, and we get there and i found a parking spot around the corner, right where the 7-11 is. and as i'm parking, jordan notices these two men talking and walking, and one of 'em has a cane, so jordan made some joke along the lines of "he should start hitting him with his stick." and we both look a little closer and jordan starts to say, "hey doesn't that look like..." and before he could finish his sentence, i said "yeah, i think that IS keifer sutherland." so we quickly get outta the car, by this time the two men had rounded the corner, and we were like "where did they go?" and we started cutting through the 7-11 parking lot, heading towards the diner, but then see that they're actually heading into 7-11, so then i'm like "uh, i think we need to get something from 7-11," and so we backtrack. and we reach the door, and they're still there cuz one of them was smoking. and there, in the bright light coming from the store, we see that it totally IS him. and me and jordan are both huge 24 fans, so we're just giddy. and we totally forgot to be cool and casual and just stood there staring, which i think prompted them to look at us, and that's when we remembered to go in the store. but before we walked in, i blurted out "i love your show," like a big dork, but he was soooooo cool about it. he said, "aww, thank you!," really sincerely, too, even though i'm sure he must hear that all the time. and then jordan asked him about his cane, and he said that, yeah, he got hurt taping 24. and we're just like, damn, he's cool. we didn't even notice the other guy at all, we were all about keifer. it coulda been another famous person, for all we knew. eh. so then we're finally in the store, and we're like, "dum duh dum, what to buy?" jordan spotted some jone's soda, and so i bought a root beer cuz i liked the label on that one the best. it was a picture of marbles. it's pretty cool.

so after all the excitement, we finally made it to fred 62, which i liked alright. definitely had a trendy atmosphere to the place. i liked the fries, but the grilled cheese sandwhich that i ordered was too greasy for my liking. but it was a cool little place. when we were done eating and were heading back to the car, we noticed that keifer and the original guy and a few others were sitting at one of the sidewalk tables at the electric lotus, another restaurant on that same block. and this time, we're cool. we kinda point it out to each other, but just keep on walking. and i came home feeling very satisfied with my evening.

today was a total lazy sunday, which i loved! did some reading, did laundry, cleaned my room, wrapped a few presents. just chilled. also made plans to hang out w/ nancy next weekend. we hadn't had a chance so far cuz she had gone back to santa cruz to visit for a bit and take care of some school things, apparently. and now she's not going back to school til april, cuz one of the last few classes that she needs isn't gonna be offered til then, so she'll be here in L.A. until then! cool. i'm excited that she'll be around when everyone gets back from break, cuz then we can all hang out together! that'll be good times.

and now the weekend has come to an end and i am ready for bed. night night!

posted at 12:04 AM

Sunday, December 15, 2002

simple pleasure i enjoy: warm, clean clothes, straight out of the dryer. mmmm. mine smell like snuggle! =P

posted at 10:06 PM

i just had the best celebrity spotting EVER!!!!! keifer sutherland, baby! it was fucking cool. me and jordan were all giddy. heehee! me and jordan are on a streak, having some good adventures together! =) anyway, i'll tell the whole story later cuz i'm really tired. sleepy time now!

posted at 2:36 AM

Saturday, December 14, 2002

today i went shopping for rick's christmas gift, cuz i wanna make sure to give it to him this wednesday when he's here, cuz i won't see him again til almost a whole week after christmas, and he called me again! just to say that he was thinking about me. awwww. dammit, makes me miss him even more! i got all choked up right there in the store. =( but then thinking about him and about how much i miss him got me thinking about how great it'll be when i'm with him in washington, and i got all happy again. =) and i got excited about his gift, too. i got everything i needed. i think it'll be good. can't wait to give it to him on wednesday. eek! i'm excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

last night i went with jordan to this alice in wonderland theme party, where you were supposed to dress up like something you might see in wonderland. not necessarily one of the characters, but just kinda weird or whatever. and i thought the idea was pretty neat, so i got all into it, and jordan and i were having fun dressing up. we both did like a weird superhero thing. i had on my lightning bolt shirt and fashioned a cape out of my ladybug dress, and jordan also made a cape from a blanket, and he wore his underwear over his pants. and then to be weirder, he combed his hair all funny, and i put on my antenna and these black and white striped socks that i have, and rolled my pants up all high so you could see them. i thought we looked pretty cool. but then of course we get there, and no one else was dressed up! well, except for the ppl who lived there. doh! oh well. then i saw michael there and he said he was heading to another party, and me, jordan, and deema (one of jordan's friends who also went w/ us, but who wasn't dressed up) decided to follow. but then there seemed to be some confusion when we were on the row, and we kinda parted ways w/ michael and the crew he was with, and we went to spudnuts. we each got a chocolate donut that had just come out of the oven, so it was all warm still. yum! then we walked deema home and hung out there for a bit and came back. it was a pretty fun night. deema was cool.

and now i must get ready for my office christmas party. i'm not really sure what to expect. i'm so sad rick isn't here to go w/ me! i'm sure he woulda been a hit. oh well. jordan said he'd go with me, and i said i'd go with him to this other party he heard about after that. oh, and deema's going w/ us to that one, too. so we'll go to my boss's place for the office party (which is really close to here, actually), sneak out as early as we can, then come back here to change into pajamas (possibly), and then head to 'sc for the other party. sounds like a plan. break!

posted at 8:10 PM

Friday, December 13, 2002

rick called me all the way from brazil!!! that made me so happy! awwww. dammit, i miss him! can't wait to see him on wednesday. too bad it'll only be for a few hours, though. sad. but then practically a whole week with him in january! yay! oh, i'm so excited about going to seattle and granger (and possibly canada?)! just two weeks away, baby! woo-hoo!

posted at 6:53 PM

Wednesday, December 11, 2002

ah, the immaturity continues. i see our anonymous poster has struck again. *rolls eyes* honestly, i don't know what they're trying to achieve. do they think that they're hurting me w/ their little poems/lyrics/whatever those are? please. like i really give a rat's ass what someone having nothing to do w/ my life thinks of me. although i'm flattered that they care so much about my life that they've come here four times today alone (lesson of the day, kids: IP addresses leave a mark), this is pretty lame. the slight entertainment value i found in these little posts before has worn out. and in keeping w/ the "it's my space, i get to do whatever i want here" issue, any future comments left by this person will be promptly deleted. this has gone on long enough. i have better things to do w/ my time than deal with this stupid game. and it's still really annoying that he/she/they/whoever refuse to just say directly what their problem w/ me is, and instead leave these cutesy little, and completely irrelevant, messages (i's a money hungry woman? uh...ok). anyway, a big WHATEVER to the whole situation. i wash my hands of it. done and done.

moving on, i was looking around through all my mp3 files cuz i felt like playing something on my winamp, and i came across my dashboard playlist. haha, i never bought the places, i just downloaded all the songs. i realized how i haven't listened to dashboard in soooooo long, so i decided to play it. and it was weird as soon as those first few notes came on, just cuz of the association i have with it now, from a much sadder time in my life. and it's funny, cuz when i first downloaded all the songs and started listening to them, i had no such association. i had just heard a little about dashboard and thought i might like it. and i did, i liked it a lot. but it wasn't until i hit that sad period that i started playing it A LOT, and when i first started to really relate to it. not even so much cuz of the lyrics (altho there are some jems in there that i thought matched me perfectly at the time), but because of the general air of just plain angst that it has. and it feels kinda weird listening to it now cuz it's making me remember that angst i lived through. but it's also kinda comforting, just as it was then. i don't know. weird, but in a good way. i still like it a lot and think this is really good music. and i even like the associations it brings with it, cuz even though i was so sad, i remember that was the first time in my life that i was ever so in touch w/ my emotions. i think it's about the time i started this blog, too. so that had something to do w/ it as well. but yeah, i was just FEELING so much, and that felt pretty good. so that's why it's a little weird to listen to dashboard now, cuz it dredges up so much. and that's not necessarily bad, but i definitely have to be in a certain mood for it. and haha, i went off on that tangent a lot longer than i thought i would. eh. MY space. =)

posted at 11:42 PM

Tuesday, December 10, 2002

it feels sooooooo good to have gotten some things off my chest. i just wrote this long-ass e-mail, spurred by the anonymous comment left about the post i made on friday. i have very strong suspicions as to who left it, and frankly this person was long over-due for a little piece of my mind. it's totally no-holds-barred, and pretty harsh, but i don't care. i just needed to let it all out there, let this person know exactly what i think of them. as you can imagine, it goes beyond simply the comment they left. i won't get too much into it, but i just wanted to point out a few things. first of all, the comment accuses me of bashing sunny, which i don't even see how they got. all i've ever done is state how i felt about our relationship, and my frustration and disappointment with how it played out. but regardless of whether i did bash him or not, it just comes back to the issue jen recently wrote about in her blog: it's MY fucking space. i get to say whatever the fuck i want here. this is to be understood by anyone who reads this. i refuse to ever stop writing honestly about what i think and feel, whenever i feel like!

the other thing that bothered me about the comment was how it was anonymous. i obviously know this person, since we have a person in common, and since they're reading my blog. the fact that they turn right around and bash me anonymously (after accusing me of bashing someone else) is just plain annoying (on top of hypocritical). if you have shit to say about me, fine. but at least have balls enough to stand behind it.

anyway, that's my little rant. i'm not really all that worked up about this. i just don't care what people think of me. as long as i'm comfortable w/ MYSELF, all is good.

posted at 1:46 AM

Saturday, December 07, 2002

yay! i finally got my haircut. it's been like 9 months since my last one! long overdue. i'm pretty happy w/ it. i'm sure most people won't even notice, cuz it's pretty much the same cut i got last time, only i think it has a better shape. and also, i didn't get it cut as short as before, which is good, cuz i was unhappy w/ how short it came out last time. and finally, all of the dyed parts are gone! well, for the most party anyway. my hair is all one color again. and all the nasty damaged ends that had the dye are gone. =) i feel good.

posted at 2:59 PM

oh man, i'm so full! i just came back from the orange:house potluck. it was fun. and people liked my mole! yay me! i brought back my pot completely empty. it made me happy that people enjoyed my food. =) i guess people went out to some parties afterwards, but i didn't really feel like it. i'm glad jordan came w/ me, cuz then i didn't have to drive back home by myself. cuz under normal circumstances, i probably woulda stayed over at orange:house w/ rick, or he woulda come back w/ me. but alas, he is gone. as emily put it, i'm rickless. haha. emily's come up w/ some good ones lately. that t-shirt thing and now this. but yeah, rickless. that's how i totally felt being at his own house and not having him around. i can't help but miss that silly boy.

posted at 12:24 AM

Friday, December 06, 2002

hahahaha. emily just made me laugh about this whole chris mess. she brought up that "hurts too much" line and how sunny used it too, and how it made her think of friends and that episode where brad pitt guest stars and him and ross were in that "i hate rachel club". she said that they should make t-shirts saying, "i hate jessica club" on it, and underneath, the motto, "it hurts too much." it's funny cuz it's true. *sigh* sad, but true.

posted at 12:28 AM

OH MY GOD!!!!!!! i just found out chris blocked me from his im. how sad! that's really really sad. i was just counseling emily on her situation w/ adam, cuz she's about to leave for home for about a month after finals are over, and she and him just started dating but seem to be really hitting it off, and she brought up how it's kind of a similar situation that chris and i had. so we got a little into that, and then i was complaining about how i never talk to him anymore, and then i realized that i never even see him online anymore. and then i realized that he was always online before, even when he wasn't there, he always had away messages up. and i didn't want to suspect it, but then emily jokingly said that maybe he blocked me. and i gave his screen name to her so she could check, and he did block me!!!! cuz he wasn't online on my list, but she said that she could see him online. man, that kinda hurts, i have to say. and i wonder, does this have anything to do w/ the sounds eclectic show? did he see me and rick? did he see us trying to avoid him? does he maybe think that i don't want to talk to him anymore? does he think i'm a bitch? does he want nothing to do w/ me, just like i was afraid he might? this is really sad. i think i'm going to e-mail him, and try to find out what's up. i just think it kinda sucks that he never talked to me about any of this stuff and then just went along his way deleting me from his life. and what gets me kinda worked up is how when the time we went to starbucks, and we were saying goodbye, he said something like, "let's not let another 3 weeks go by w/out hanging out," and then we barely even spoke after that! and, like, i'm really trying to understand this whole "it hurts too much to be your friend" thing, but i really can't. cuz i've been there! when rick broke up w/ me the first time around, i was completely heartbroken. more messed up over him than i'd been over any other guy before. and yes, it hurt. A FUCKING LOT. and being around him immediately after that was REALLY hard. but the thought of not having him in my life at all, hurt even more. cuz i'd always thought he was a great person and i felt this connection w/ him, same as i did w/ chris. so i sucked it up, and after rick and i got over that weird period, we had some really good times hanging out as just friends (really good friends, i'd like to believe). and that couldnt've happened if i had decided that it hurt too much to be around him and decided to block him out of my life. and it makes me really sad and kinda of indignant that some people just can't see it that way. and that aren't willing to give me a chance as a friend. sucks.

posted at 12:14 AM

Thursday, December 05, 2002

woo-hoo! i just finished making my dish for the potluck tomorrow, and i think it turned out pretty good! at least, i like it. i don't know what others will think, cuz it's a little different. i made mole, which is a mexican dish. it's chicken with this special sauce, and the sauce is a spicy chocolate sauce. it may sound kinda strange, but i think it's yummy. cuz i like spicy. and also cuz i'm mexican, so it's not strange to me. it took me a while, though, cuz i've never made it before. i hit a few snags, but i got through them eventually. i couldn't quite get the sauce to the right consistency, and i had to go back and forth between boiling it down and adding more broth a few times. and then i was trying not to let it get too spicy, cuz i know some people are squirmy about that, but i didn't wanna sacrifice flavor. hopefully i got a good balance. and then the biggest disappointment was when i realized that i had a lot less chicken than i thought. i had bought one of those big packages w/ the chicken already skinned and de-boned, and then i opened it up and realized there were only like six breasts in there! so i decided to shred up the chicken so that more people could have some, albeit in smaller portions. oh well, what can you do? but i'm excited about the potluck. should be fun! can't wait to eat lotsa yummy food!

posted at 11:23 PM

oh sad. rick leaves for brazil today. i'm happy and excited for him, but at the same time i'm gonna miss the silly boy. he'll only be gone two weeks, which isn't really that long, but what sucks is that the very same day that he gets back, he leaves for his family christmas vacation, which they're spending in mexico. and then from mexico he flies directly back to washington. so i'll only see him for a few hours tops after he comes back from brazil, and then not again til the 31st, when i fly to seattle to spend new year's with him. that's practically a whole month! i didn't quite realize before. *sigh* i know i'll keep myself busy. i have lots of things planned, lots of little projects i keep meaning to get started on, but haven't quite gotten around to. tonight i'm making my dish for the potluck at orange:house tomorrow. saturday i have my long overdue hair appointment at the place jen recommended me to. sometime soon i wanna re-design this blog. i also wanna finish my book that i've been reading since this summer! damn, i've been slacking! i'm *this* close to finishing, tho. also, i get to spend lots of time w/ nancy cuz she'll be here all of december before she goes back to santa cruz. and of course, christmas w/ the fam. lots of stuff, lots of stuff. good times await. i'll just miss having good times w/ rick. =( but i guess this separation makes me even more excited about me traveling to spend new years w/ him! that'll be *really* good times! =)

posted at 9:12 AM

Tuesday, December 03, 2002

i'm sick and tired. literally. again. blah. i don't feel as bad as i did the last time i got sick, tho, which i suppose is good. but still. blah. and i had a blah day today, too. nothing really bad, but just blah. first of all, i was just tired. from lack of sleep, which is hard to do when you can't breathe. and then i ran out of one of my hair-taming products and had an especially shitty bad hair day (i say especially cuz i never really have good hair days, just days when it's more in control). and also, today for the first time in a really long while i just got really aggravated by my glasses, which i've been wearing all the time since i lost one of my contacts. i dunno, i think it was the combination of the bad hair along w/ the glasses. too reminiscent of junior high. eech. none too pretty. and it's also cold today. so yeah, just a blah day. i think i wanna crawl into my bed now, and get warmed up.

posted at 8:45 PM